deepbrew

Deep Brew–That’s what life’s all about. Nothing like a good mug of real stuff to warm the soul, to liven’ your life, to bring joy to dark days. And it had better be nice and dark, dark and deep. If you can see the bottom of the mug, that’s not deep brew. Coffee and I have a very special relationship. In the morning, when I’m in bed trying to clear the fog out of my brain, it’s thoughts of that special mug of dark stuff that pull me from my bed. I do love sleeping. Too much. But thankfully my love for coffee comes first, and gives me a very compelling reason to get up every morning.

Tastes vary when it comes to coffee, but all true coffee devotees will agree to this– that sugar and coffee don’t even belong in the same zip code! Sugar is great in things like donuts and dogfood, but for cryin’ out loud keep it OUT of the coffee! It is permissible only for beginning coffee drinkers, but they must be weaned off of it as soon as possible. If not, they may become addicted to the stuff (the sugar), and you know we don’t want that!

It was at a relatively young age that I first came to be acquainted with Coffee. My first encounters were nothing extraordinary, just sips here and there. But as I became more and more familiar with that incredible flavor, and had the courage to go cold-turkey on sugar, Coffee became a close friend of mine. Yes, I must admit, and it is with deep regret, that our first experiences were marred by the presence of that adulterous substance, sugar. Thankfully I’ve since been delivered from that.

Unfortunately, my parents have not. Every morning I am nearly overcome with a wave of sadness and horror as I watch my own dear mother pour in a generous amount of that sickly sweetening substance. I have gone to great lengths to rid them of the habit, but to no avail. It remains a blot on our family’s name.

Now you are thinking I am going to attack creamer. Well, you are only partly right. As far as I’m concerned, powdered or any kind of non-dairy creamer can go back to the moon where it came from. Give me the real stuff. Some of you hard-core afficionados may be reeling in horror at this point as you realize that I actually put cream in my coffee. Yes my friends, it is true. In my mind nothing but cream can improve a rich mug of deep brew. You must remember that I grew up on a farm and we milked cows. I love milk! I love cheese! I love anything that comes from a cow! Well, I guess there are a few notable exceptions. Cream is to coffee as butter is to toast, as steak sauce is to steak, as milk is to cereal. Understand, I’m not saying a cup of coffee can’t be enjoyed without cream–I do it fairly regularly when no cream is to be had–but it is definitely essential for full enjoyment.

Along with the degradation of the American culture, with the advent of things like rock music and the IRS, came to the coffee scene the introduction of new pollutants–those abominable flavored creamers. If there’s one thing I will not tolerate, it is the adulteration of my perfectly good coffee with one of those horrid flavor things. Irish Cream, Amaretto, Hazelnut, you can have them all! Coffee was meant to be enjoyed for its own exquisite flavor. It was not meant to be tampered with by the addition of foreign substances. Of course, real cream is not considered a foreign substance.

I’ll take coffee-flavored coffee, please